Hello Friends!
I was wonderfully inspired by a post from Victoria or Fatfabfeminist, please follow them on Instagram and Tiktok if you are not!
Currently, there is a discourse going around about the hesitance to carry inclusive sizes in stores. If you are new to that conversation, anyone who is above a size 16 cannot buy clothing in most stores. The average Woman in America is a size 18. This makes zero sense. So why does including fat people enrage us? Why does the idea of having availability or access for another person feel like a personal attack?
Well there are tons of reasons stemming from White Supremacy and Anti-blackness, but today let’s explore how the individual is taught to create their sense of value through the belittling of others. I know that sounds intense, but stick with me! We are not properly taught how to create a foundational sense of self worth. Being raised in a capitialistic society that profits on comparison has damaged our ability to find value in humanity. Growing up, self worth is modeled through the lens of privilege. People with more access or genetically valued features (which are not earned) are treated better by society and elevated for simply existing.
An example would be someone who is genetically thin is complimented frequently on their thinness, less likely to be mistreated in medical situations and has full access to all of their needs. While a genetically larger bodied person would be told they have a pretty face, denied testing for medical concerns and not be able to shop at ANY stores in the mall. We have been taught to see this as “normal” instead of dehumanizing. Creating a body hierarchy value system based on ableism, sizeism, gender conformity and racism. The individual has minimal control over these body identities but have been categorized as less than due to their placement on this structure.
These are socialized belief systems that we are exposed to daily. Through modeling and media we have been taught a very thin, white, straight and physically active value structure. When creating our personal sense of value we use the hierarchy as a measuring tool. Mostly, because we were never taught how to value someone based on their humanity, character or kindness. Instead, value is placed on things that are genetic. Our use of comparison as a crutch in the creation and maintenance of our self worth leaves our sense of self vulnerable to advertising and isolation.
So why does the idea of inclusivity cause such anger? If you were taught to build your sense of worth on the genetic thinness of your body and I said, “hey we don’t hate fat people anymore”, what does that mean for your self worth? If your value is no longer derived from being superior to others, what do you become? Inclusivity, in this instance, is being perceived as a threat to the individual. The individuals sense of value that was built on the hatred or dehumanization of others. The hope here is realizing that we don’t have to build self worth in this way. That we have the power to reflect, explore and change our understanding of worth.
The individual is upholding the system by maintaining the values created by the system through comparison, judgment and othering. I will end with some reflection questions to explore our relationship with self worth.
What are my unearned privileges?
If I was in the shoes of someone without the privileges what would I feel? Be honest.
What would it look like if your value was measured by your humanity and not your appearance? How could things change for you? Dream up what that world could look like.